Compostings - Al Batt
ECHOES FROM THE LOAFERS’ CLUB MEETING
My Uncle Luther could hold his breath for 30 minutes.
That’s incredible.
Not really. He could do it only once.
DRIVING BY BRUCE’S DRIVE
I have a wonderful neighbor named Bruce. Whenever I pass his drive, thoughts occur to me. The weather was...
ECHOES FROM THE LOAFERS’ CLUB MEETING
I was walking an Alaskan trail when I met a bear. All I had in my backpack was a can of fly spray, so I sprayed the bear.
What happened?
The bear flew away.
DRIVING BY BRUCE’S DRIVE
I have a wonderful neighbor named Bruce. Whenever I...
ECHOES FROM THE LOAFERS’ CLUB MEETING
I have the memory of an elephant.
Really?
Yes, I remember seeing an elephant at a fair when I was nine years old.
ECHOES FROM THE LOAFERS’ CLUB MEETING TOO
Folklore said if a woman saw a robin flying overhead on Valentine’s Day, it meant she...
ECHOES FROM THE LOAFERS’ CLUB MEETING
My sister is a librarian. She hit me with a grammar book.
Did you get a concussion?
No, but I was in a comma for a week.
DRIVING BY BRUCE’S DRIVE
I have a wonderful neighbor named Bruce. Whenever I pass his drive, thoughts occur to me. We’d been...
ECHOES FROM THE LOAFERS’ CLUB MEETING
It’s a great day.
What happened?
The bulb in my car’s “check engine” light finally burned out.
DRIVING BY BRUCE’S DRIVE
I have a wonderful neighbor named Bruce. Whenever I pass his drive, thoughts occur to me. Each year, I suffer through...
ECHOES FROM THE LOAFERS’ CLUB MEETING
I want to be a millionaire just like my dad.
Was your father a millionaire?
No, but he wanted to be a millionaire.
DRIVING BY BRUCE’S DRIVE
I have a wonderful neighbor named Bruce. Whenever I pass his drive, thoughts occur to me. The...
ECHOES FROM THE LOAFERS’ CLUB MEETING
I think my car was made in Prague.
What makes you think that?
Every time I start it, the Czech engine light comes on.
DRIVING BY BRUCE’S DRIVE
I have a wonderful neighbor named Bruce. Whenever I pass his drive, thoughts occur to me. I fired up the car’s furnace...
ECHOES FROM THE LOAFERS’ CLUB MEETING
My expensive watch with a lifetime guarantee stopped working.
Is the company going to replace it?
No, but one of their representatives is going to call me every hour on the hour and tell me what time it is.
DRIVING BY BRUCE’S DRIVE
I...
ECHOES FROM THE LOAFERS’ CLUB MEETING
For our meeting tomorrow, I’m going to make one of those diagrams that use the intersecting circles.
Venn?
Tomorrow.
DRIVING BY BRUCE’S DRIVE
I have a wonderful neighbor named Bruce. Whenever I pass his drive, thoughts occur to me. When...
ECHOES FROM THE LOAFERS’ CLUB MEETING
I didn’t expect to see you here at Medicine Square Garden.
I fell.
How did you come to fall?
I didn’t come to fall. I came to skate.
DRIVING BY BRUCE’S DRIVE
I have a wonderful neighbor named Bruce. Whenever I pass his drive,...