Funeral services help us work through grief

Grief and death are difficult for us. This isn’t exactly a ground-breaking statement, but after leading three funerals over the course of eight days, I’ve recently been reminded that, as a culture, when faced with grief and death, we often don’t know what to do.

 

This is one reason why we have funeral services, to help us work through grief and death.

Sometimes we tell ourselves that we must “stay strong” for our family, which is simply another way of saying, “don’t cry.” Sometimes we think we must hide our pain or our grief from others as our way of protecting them. And when we see someone else grieve, we sometimes would rather avoid them rather than sit with them in their grief because we feel pressured to find the “right words” to say and we just can’t seem to think of what those words are. This is another reason why we have funeral services, to help us feel permission to grieve.

 

As Christians, there is one reason above all other reasons to have a funeral service for a loved one - to remind us of our sure and certain hope in Jesus and the resurrection of the dead. In other words, for us as Christians, a funeral service isn’t primarily about the deceased, although obviously that is important, but a funeral service is primarily a church service for the loved ones left behind. As a church service, Jesus Christ is to be at the center, just as He is at the center of all worship, because Jesus’ victory over sin, death, and the devil is clearly proclaimed. There are two primary parts of the service that provide an opportunity to proclaim Christ to the grieving heart, through music during the service and the reading and preaching of God’s Word.

 

Yes, music is an opportunity to proclaim Christ. The songs that we sing during a funeral service are there not simply as a “nice touch” to the service, but songs are present to express the deep richness of our faith in Christ and remind us of our hope and comfort in Him. As we sing songs at a funeral, we are singing God’s faithfulness, of His love for us in Christ, of Christ’s substitutionary atonement, of the remission of our sins through faith in Christ, of the resurrection, of the promise of eternal life for all who die in Christ.

 

We sing these songs not simply because they are good to sing, but because those truths are the truths that we need to hear, especially during a time of grief and death. We not only sing those truths in song to God, but we encourage others, and even ourselves, as we sing the truth in those lyrics.

 

The second primary part of the service that provides an opportunity to proclaim Christ to the grieving heart is the reading and preaching of God’s Word. From the Old Testament, which reveals God’s plan for salvation for His creation. From the Psalms we hear the depths of emotions and that even during our most trying times, we have a loving and merciful Savior. From the Epistle reading we hear of the peace we have with God through Christ and his sacrifice for our sins, as well as the Christian’s sure and certain hope in the resurrection from the dead and the life of the world to come. In the Gospel reading and sermon, we hear from Christ’s own words of his love and comfort for us.

 

The reason for funerals can sometimes get blurred, and as our culture becomes less and less Christian and funerals become less and less about Christ and the hope we have in Him, this trend will probably continue for some time. As difficult as it is to work through grief and death, we remember that we have the answer, the answer is Christ Jesus, who bled and died for us, who is the author and perfecter of our faith, who by His life, death, and resurrection defeated sin, death, and the power of the devil. The reason for a funeral is to remind ourselves as Christians of our sure and certain hope in Jesus and the resurrection of the dead.